Trusting the Lord

July 5, 2012

This is a comment I made on one of my friend’s blogs. She lost her six year old daughter, Nevaeh (our spunky princess) to cancer last October. She recently went to a bereaved mothers retreat, and was confiding on her blog that she realized she lost her trust in the Lord. I shared with her a few of the things I’ve learned through my recent journey of trust. Maybe they’ll be a blessing to you too.

Hello My Dear Friend,
Sometimes it is so hard to trust a supernatural being. We do not, nor will we ever this side of Heaven, understand Him. I’ve struggled with the same thing with dad. The Lord did such a work to get him on the transplant list. He opened so many door and really gave us such a hope that dad was going to make it. Being the only one on the list, he really should have gotten a liver in a matter of weeks. It never came. When one was finally available back in May, some fluke thing happened with some of his antibodies, and his kidney wouldn’t be able to accept it. That was when I realized, this may not happen. It almost seemed a cruel joke that God could open so many doors, give us (especially mom)so many literal and Biblical signs of hope. (I’ll have to tell you about them all sometime). After his hemorrhage and major set back on the 26th (mine and my parents anniversary, ironic huh?) that big flame of hope shrank down to just a small flicker. When were leaving the hospital with dad, going home to spend the last few days with him I really worried about mom. Would she be upset with the Lord? It almost seemed as if He had lied to her. I should have known better. This sure wasn’t her first rodeo. She told me later, “You know. I’m glad the Lord gave us hope those last few months. Otherwise we would have been in deep depression. It gave us something to live for, to be happy about.” Her Faith is amazing. Dee McGaughey told her and me as well, that all the promises of life, and health that that hope we were promised, really were answered. It wasn’t how we wanted or even thought they would be answered, but God did heal him, and he is still alive. More than he ever was in some sense. I looked back at the verses that God gave me for dad, the verses of hope and comfort, and really Heaven answered them more completely than a transplant ever could. Knowing how very sick he was inside now, I’m actually a little thankful that he didn’t have to suffer through such a major surgery that probably wouldn’t have worked anyway.
Again, trusting a God that never really shows you all the reasons why, or reveals the future (or even the present) is not easy, or even natural. But I’ve found out so many times, that he hides things from us for our benefit. The times in the past that I did think dad was dying, I was in such turmoil. I think if I knew for sure that it was happening then, I would have been a train wreck. The gift of hope that God gave me really did get me through it. It made the journey much more peaceful and doable.
That’s one thing that I’ve learned about the Lord and his grace. It only works for the present, not the future. I know it will be there when I need it, but if I live in today, God’s grace is there. If I think about tomorrow or all the horrible “what ifs”, I fall apart.
So my encouragement, Amy is to trust God today. Don’t fret over how you’ll make it through those special anniversaries without her. We’ll get there soon enough. Think of today. It’s not easy to be here without her, but it is doable.
I love you and your family so much. I’m so thankful the Lord knit our hearts together! I’m praying for you. Love, Carrie

Honor Thy Father

June 26, 2012

I want to please the Lord by honoring my father’s ministry and memory.Danny Mack Hall was a man that literally did live a thousand lives within his 62 years. Born in the small town of Ridgely,TN, raised in a family so poor that his stories sound at least a century old, he spent his teen years hitch hiking the across the country, was a member of the drug and hippie movement, but best of all, he was a prisoner that was set free in the Union City jail. He was set free from all his chains of sin by one single drop of holy, cleansing blood that floated down through the thermosphere, the stratosphere, the atmosphere, down past the smog and pollution, down to the west side of Tennessee into that tiny town, right through that cement jail cell ceiling, straight through the top bunk, and right straight into his heart. A small step of faith, but what a miracle!

Danny and Dee Dee Hall were married on May 26, 1972. Their journey of faith and ministry began at nearly the same time. They worked in missions, were house parents for troubled teens, went out of state to Bible school, helped start a church in Washington, pastored in Georgia and East TN, and finally for the last 20+ years have been in evangelism encouraging saints all over the United States.

After fighting hard a battle with hepatitis C, Dad finally laid aside his worn out flesh and put on that  “new coat” of Heavenly fibers. He was welcomed home to Heaven on June 3rd, 2012. My mother, brothers, and I all watched and encouraged him on his passage during that dark, predawn moment. After having a terrible night filled with suffering and the ugly, bloody results of past sin and disease in his “wore out” body, thankfully dad was able to rest more peacefully during his last few hours. Even though goodbye was heartrending, the memory of us all sitting beside his bed and sending him off with love is one that I will always cherish. The two days that he was home surrounded by so many dear friends and family members was a precious gift.